Andrew Bailes
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Five One-Minute Plays – Number Two: “Overused”

4/6/2017

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[Four actors facing out.]

Actor 1:
He literally fell in love with me.

Actor 2:
I literally fell in love with her.

Actor 3:
They’re literally in love!

Actor 4:
They are literally head over heels in love!

Actor 1:
I am literally starving!

Actor 2:
I could literally eat a fucking horse right now!

Actor 3:
I literally don’t know where I am!

Actor 4:
I am literally up to my ears in debt.

Actor 1:
[Not really.] I literally want a divorce.

Actor 2:
[Really.] I literally want a divorce.

Actor 3:
I’m so stressed I could literally explode!

Actor 4:
You literally look like fucking shit.

Actor 1:
[It’s a party.] I could literally drink every day of my life!

Actor 2:
[It’s not a party.] I could literally drink every day of my life.

Actor 3:
I’ve literally slept with like a thousand women.

Actor 4:
I am literally the ugliest person in the world.

Actor 1:
[Not really.] I could literally murder everyone in this room.

Actor 2:
[Really.] I could literally murder everyone in this room.

Actor 3:
You are literally a ray of sunshine.

Actor 4:
You are literally a fucking dog.

Actor 1:
I literally can’t even.

Actor 2:
I literally can’t breathe!

Actor 3:
[Not really.] I could literally kill myself right now.

Actor 4:
[Really.] I could literally kill myself right now.

End.

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